A New Year, A New Start

Happy New Year everyone!!! Hope your 2018 is off to a wonderful start. Have you set any new year’s resolutions? Here is my list of ten resolutions for the year:

  1. Visit 10 hot spots in Ottawa with my friend Hetal
  2. Be more like my Mom (this may take many years!)
  3. Get a job I love, pay down debt, be financially savvy
  4. Complete my Creative Writing Certificate at U of T (it’s my final year!)
  5. Turn 39 (LOL I have to make sure I achieve at least one of these)
  6. Travel to a place I haven’t been before
  7. Take part in Walk In Her Shoes in Ottawa (perhaps Sophie Gregoire will be there again this year?!)
  8. Read lots of good books
  9. Dance, smile, and laugh a lot… and learn to let go
  10. Visit my friends in T.O. as often as possible

Also here are a few foundational things that are important to do on an ongoing basis, that set the stage for accomplishing any goal, and ensuring that I live healthily and happily.

Tools/Ongoing Practice:

  1. Eating healthy and cooking lots
  2. Regular yoga practice
  3. Spending lots of time in nature
  4. Facetiming my grandparents
  5. Lots of laughter!

I’d love to hear your resolutions if you have any!! It’s always easier to get things done with the support of others, and especially knowing that the universe has your back. And finally, even if nothing gets done… there is always rebellion. ;-)

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!

What If God Was One Of Us

I’m at the Jimmy’s Coffee across the street from Raju’s, and I just adore this place! Three floors, mostly full of hipsters… definitely not 9-5ers. I’m sitting here with my latte and book (If Nuns Ruled the World), at the long wooden table on the second floor. I love these tables because it makes me feel like I’m part of a group. Ok, it’s not like we talk to one another (the girl across from me has her headphones in and is texting away) but it just feels nice and connected somehow. I love the natural light in this place, it fills the floors and lifts my spirit.

Alright let’s see if I can remember the walk from October 6 (week 40!). I left my place at York & Queens Quay around 11:30 AM, walked up Bay and through Nathan Philips Square, and got to the Duke of Somerset at around noon. I met with Steve, my old manager at CCO to discuss a potential role as a Senior Analyst. It was so good to see him and I have to be honest, it brought up so many old memories. Good ones and painful ones. He is as passionate and clever as ever, and when I looked over the role and said that I didn’t think I was qualified, he said “Of course you are. You are smart and capable.” We chatted about work and how important it is to pick the right people to join your team (he has a great knack for that). I had a veggie burger and I think he had a burger too… we were a little pressed for time because he had to run for a 1:15 PM meeting, but he pushed it back a little further so that we had more time to talk.

Then I went over to 525 to see Jasmine and get my eyebrows done by her lovely colleague. She took me into the boardroom that she’d booked and cleaned them up for me, gave them a little more shape, and it all cost only $3. Wow! I normally pay more than $25 at La Main Dor Salon, but Shahla is a goddess and she’s been doing my eyebrows for years. She plays the most beautiful Indian classical music or Spanish guitar or haunting Persian songs. Sometimes we talk, but sometimes I just lie there and take it in. I fall into deep relaxation on that table.

Oh I forgot the main event of that day – I got a job offer from CAMH!! So the whole morning I was reeling and informing everyone. At the time it wasn’t final, still dependent on reference checks, but in my heart I knew that it was and I think I just couldn’t believe it. I still can’t believe it. I’ve been applying there since 2012 when I left CCO and I just didn’t know if/when it would happen. When I set my New Years resolutions for the year in January, for #10 I had originally written “Get a job at CAMH” and then I changed it to something more general. Hindsight is 20/20 I guess! Anyway, I’m still feeling overwhelmed and I can’t believe that I start on Monday! Holy moly. What a crazy way I’ve been living… not even “on the edge”, but “at the edge” as my Dad says.

I continued to walk to University College, where I meandered through the Harry-Potter like buildings (my favourite is King’s college) and I went up to the second floor where they were setting up for that weekend’s book fair. The year before I went with Gosia at Victoria College and it was a magical experience where we picked up lots of one-of-a-kind books. The lady there told me that it wasn’t actually open yet so I had to leave. I found an almost abandoned classroom with two girls working away, and I sat down and worked for a bit. It was an interesting afternoon since my phone had died earlier on (that’s why I don’t have many pictures in this post).

Ok I have to stop for a second because Colin just messaged me and said that CAMH called and he provided the very last reference check. I love that guy.. he has really been looking out for me lately. I told him I owed him a drink (and he gladly accepted). Hmmm.. the most amazing song is playing right now at Jimmy’s, and it’s giving me goosebumps:

What if God was one of us?
Just like a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Tryin’ to make his way home

If God had a name what would it be?
And would you call it to his face?
If you were faced with Him in all His glory
What would you ask if you had just one question?

I feel like my writing has been like an episode of Family Guy lately… it seems to be following a story, and then goes off on a tangent. Well that’s how my mind works lately. In fragments. In memories. In bursts of laughter. In confusion. In poetry. In emotions so deep that sometimes I beg that I won’t feel them. In drama. And hopefully if all goes right, in peace. In groundedness. In love. In compassion. In expansiveness. In freedom.

I carried on and came across this poster for Mindful Moments at U of T – every Monday and Thursday they offer meditation classes. Hopefully I can go for free with my U of T card!

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U of T Campus, Kings College Circle

Then I went to the Eaton Centre, standing in the line at Shoppers listening to two young girls (teenagers I think) chat about Angelina Jolie and how she has no soul and isn’t as nice as Jennifer Aniston. I joined in the convo and defended her, saying that she has seen a lot of suffering in her life through her humanitarian work, and I’m sure she carries that with her. My two cents haha! I went to Canadian Tire and bought more boxes, and dragged them home on the subway, knowing I had a full night of packing ahead of me.

In If Nuns Ruled The World, I read about Sister Madonna, who made a wager with God: If she couldn’t complete this 2012 Canadian Ironman triathlon, she wouldn’t try it again. But she did it. And at age 82, she has run more than 366 triathlons!

Running not only helped me solve my problems, it reduced my anxiety and cleared my soul, taking away any brooding darkness that took away my positive attitude.

When I got home, I had a message from Mandeep who sent me a quote that I totally needed to read. (picture above). That Dr. Seuss was a wise man.

New Years Resolutions

2016. A new year and exciting opportunities ahead. It was so stressful coming up with these resolutions but I finally have a list!

  1. Teach my kriya meditation to my friends or whoever is interested, and complete the Shambhavi meditation course
  2. Complete at least five toastmasters speeches
  3. Take three Creative Writing Courses at the University of Toronto
  4. Do my yearly Walk In Her Shoes campaign, this time walking 10 km once each week and blogging about my experiences
  5. Launch blog, advertise, think of ways to increase visibility
  6. Help Mom to complete her children’s book
  7. Take flamenco dancing classes at the Esmeralda Enrique Dance Company
  8. Speak to a classroom of students about my experiences with anxiety and depression
  9. Perform at a comedy club and this time actually invite my friends!
  10. Get my first project management contract either through my own consulting business or through an organization

Tools/Ongoing Practice

  1. Daily kriya meditation (2x/day)
  2. Body scan meditation (4x/week)
  3. Yoga (3x/week)
  4. Eating healthy and cooking lots